Normal is Highly Overrated

Today was L O N G! Getting the kids out of bed this morning was sort of like trying to get snot to ooze in a predictable pattern and be efficient. Once I'd strapped all three nuggets into the van with their oatmeal, I hit the road only to find myself stuck in traffic. Nice. When you work in an office and you run late, it's no big deal. Your boss might be pissed off and you might get a late start but they will get over it. Teachers can't be late. If the teacher is late, an entire herd of little people will be left unattended and will, most likely, revolt. I don't do late! The bigger problem was the the big kids catch connecting buses from my elementary school over the the middle school. If they miss their ride on the big yellow Twinkie, someone has to be the clean up crew and drive them. When I realized that there was no way that they'd make their connecting flight, I had Grant call Eric to play back up. When traffic finally did what I wanted it to and cleared out of my way, I dropped Annie at the sitter's house, dropped the big kids out front of the school so Eric could claim them, and then I raced to get my own things together. With standardized testing this week, there's a very specific routine we have to follow and I was really getting my drawers in a knot over being late and having to rush. Did I mention that I don't do late?

Anyway, I gave the test, ate lunch with a bunch of ladies who make normal seem relative, and then started science. Quite honestly, my nerves hadn't really ever recovered from my tardiness and I was living on the edge. The only constructive thing we had to accomplish after lunch was a science review before tomorrow's science test. As we reviewed rocks and minerals, I needed to review the term cleavage. Yes, I did say cleavage. Believe it or not, that refers to the manner in which a rock breaks. Get your mind out of the gutter! However, as I was trying to draw some mnemonic strategies to help the kids remember, I drew two rocks. Dang it! The rocks looked like boobs! Cleavage... boobs. Geez. Of course, the kids didn't realize it but I had just sunk my own battleship. Review over. What's wrong with me? Then, there was recess and the migration of the chicken nuggets back to their origins.

I sort of hated to send all of those chicken nuggets home today despite my lack of patience. I wasn't ready to head home and face an empty house again. The kids are with Eric again tonight and probably tomorrow night, too. I hate sharing them. Do you want to know my own selfish thoughts? Here they are. I have invested so much time with them. I don't want to share them with someone who carelessly walked away. Why do I have to give up time with them just so he can have time? Ugh. If I stay on this rant for too long, it would most definitely be toxic. I'm quite aware of my thoughts and feelings about this whole scenario. Bottom line, why do I have to share my wonderful little creations? Are my feelings ok? Yeah. They're my feelings. Nothing wrong with feelings. Am I being unreasonable? Yeah. I know I'm being unreasonable but this is one of those situations where my heart and brain are out of synch. So, I find myself alone again in my own house. Tomorrow morning, I will only have to get myself up and ready for school. I'm not sure I'm going to know how to do that. I'll probably still jump out of the shower and streak down the hall yelling at Grant to get up for the fifth time just out of habit.

One of the positives of coming home to the empty house was finding that my dad was on his way to look at the air conditioning unit. However, some of the girls at school told me that I could flip the "reset" switch on the unit and see if that would help. I went to look for the "reset" switch only to find that some of the wires had been chewed through. There's a family of very brazen bunnies that like to hang out in the back yard and they obviously had a Rabbits Gone Wild party and gnawed through a bunch of stuff.

Bottom line, I never found a "reset" button. I'm beginning to wonder if someone was just getting a good laugh out of me! If so, they'd better look out! I will get even!

Anyway, Fred showed up to work on the unit and when I mentioned the magical button, he gave me the look that says, "Dang! That's an awesome joke! I wish I'd thought of that first!" I went back inside to get ready for Bible study. Within a few minutes, I looked out my bedroom window to Fred disassembling the entire AC unit (I'll admit to having a slight panic attack because I wasn't sure that duct tape would reassemble some of those things) and Ethel pulling weeds from around the back fence. These folks have their own house and huge yard to take care of. I really try not to become one of those grown kids who turns into a mooch and resorts to relying on their parent's resources. I hate to depend on others. Yes, I know. That's a whole different therapy appointment.

Eventually, Fred came in and stomped upstairs. Why do I still get a nervous feeling when my father stalks me down like a feeble prey? He stood in my doorway for a few seconds. I finally asked him what the damage was and about that time, I heard the air kick on. Not only did it kick on, it actually was forcing cold air out. Wow. When I asked him what he did, he simply replied, "Don't ask, don't tell." I'm sure that means that the fix involved duct tape, something semi-illegal, and several small miracles that he didn't blow himself up during the maneuver.

So, it's now 10:30 on a school night and I'm home alone. It's so strange. I'm heading to bed after a good night at Bible study but I'm still not finished talking with myself about my attitude regarding the kids being with Eric. I have to get myself to realize that I have to share. There's lots of other stuff that I have to talk to myself about and I figure that this is a good night to do it. I just hate it when I don't pay attention to myself and then I have to get firm with myself and might end up having to impart a consequence on myself. Geez. Being normal must be so easy.

 But I discipline my body and keep it under control, lest after preaching to others I myself should be disqualified.

1 Corinthians 9:27

Good night, all.