With a nearly sleepless night due to my own brain deciding to crank into action about 1:00 a.m. compounded with a snuggly squid lodged underneath my armpit trying to avoid hearing the thunder, I've been in a very dense fog all day. I'm thankful that yesterday's puker did not continue redecorating the bathroom today, though. It must have been something that he ate. However, with the 1:00 a.m. call to order of my brain cells, the squid bed mate, and that anxiety that all moms know regarding the timing of a puking child (will they, won't they?), we did not make it to church this morning. We did tune in via the internet. Annie is always amused when I do this. Although, she was still piled in my bed watching Sofia the First over and over again while I tried to glean something from the sermon. Like I said, "Whew!"
We did manage to make some cookies to overcome the ills of the previous night. The kids lovingly call these "poop cookies." I am in continual fear of receiving a note from Annie's school informing me that she has said something extraordinarily colorful at school! I can just see it now! Some well-bred, cultured mom is handing out chocolate cupcakes for her little dumpling's birthday at school and Annie yells out, "Those look like my mom's poop cookies!" I've gotta say that she is the most incriminating nugget out of this three pack.
Those who know me well can tell you that when I start baking (ok, the cookies count as baking even though they are officially "no bake" cookies), I've got something on my mind. Yeah, I do. Just when I think I know everything and I have life figured out - WHAM! I'm beginning to think that I am probably His worst student! Even though I have the instruction book right in front of my face, I continue to fail the tests. I saw a sign the other day that said something like, "When you're in school, the lesson comes before the test but in life, the lesson usually comes after the test." Yeah. I probably need to file that somewhere important. I feel like I've had to revise every single thing that I thought and believed about myself over the last three years. I guess there have been a few boxes that I had shoved back into the corner of my mind and hoped I wouldn't need to open up and overhaul them. Wrong. I'm not going to get into the nitty gritty of it tonight but I can tell you that my visions of what relationships should look like have been majorly tainted by the Hallmark Chanel. While I tossed my rose colored glasses quite a few miles back, I still get hung up with some pretty warped expectations. At this point, it's so hard to separate bruises from the past with the discomfort of moving out of my comfort zone. Ok. Enough said. Sometimes, I just wish I had some sort of external hard drive that could be wiped clean and reprogrammed with the updated software. I guess there's just not much character building to be gained with that scenario, though, or faith building.
So, to top off my already foggy and feeble mind today, Annie started telling me about DNA. Thinking back, I think she was actually saying something about this yesterday but I dismissed the fact that any four year old would know what DNA was. I just thought she was screwing up the ABCs again and I welcomed that from her - something more toddlerish. But, nope! When I unpacked her school bag a couple of hours ago, there was a sheet in her behavior folder that said she'd learned about and built DNA. There were toothpicks, Twizzlers, and gumdrops in the baggie with the info sheet. Well, crap. I guess I better refresh my memory about what DNA is because I've sure forgotten. Oh well. Once again, I'm dumbfounded by the smarts of the third child. I'm rather thankful at this point that there's not a fourth or fifth kid in the mix. They probably would be overthrowing civilization before they ever made it out of Huggies. How do the Duggars do it? That 20th kid has to be sort of like a mini-rocket scientist!
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| Yeah, I know it's upside down but I don't have the brain cells to figure out how to flip DNA at this point. I'd probably screw up someone's genetic code by trying to flip the dumb things! |
But, the crowning moment of the day was sort of the final straw. Grant looked out my bedroom window and said, "Um, Mom? Did you know that there's a tree that fell?" Nice. I'm thankful that it didn't end up on the house and I guess I'm sort of laughing at the fact that it fell on the shade tent that I'd already used zip ties to repair. Hmmm.... I'm thinking that I'm going to have to have a tent disassembling party and invite folks over to help me tear that thing down and carry it out of here. I think it's worth a couple of steaks on the grill for sure! Takers? Oh well. Like I said, at least it's not on top of the house, in the house, or... I don't know. It's laughable at this point tonight.
So, for tonight, I'm still processing and trying to be open to this whole overhaul but it's sure not easy. Realizing that you're a stupid-head just isn't a fun thing. And, when you've had your head buried in the sand for so many years, it takes quite a while to get the sand out of all of those unknown places! No one ever said that wisdom is free.
11 Discretion will protect you and understanding will guard you.12 Wisdom will save you from the ways of wicked men, from men whose words are perverse, 13 who have left the straight paths
to walk in dark ways Proverbs 2:11-13
Good night, all.
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